Rules of "engagement"

[jtex316]

What are your rules for banging chicks / girls you work with / girls you meet / etc??

Here are some of mine.

1. The "I Don't Know" rule
Basically, if a girl approaches you and wants to do it, if you "don't know" anyone who would be affected by it (friend, boyfriend, girlfriend), then proceed. 

2. Co-Workers
I don't have a problem with this, but it must be a NO STRINGS ATTACHED thing.  The last thing you need is a fight or feeling of discomfort at work.  But they can get on their knees for you, no problem

3. Married...with Children
Definitely, just proceed with caution and MAKE SURE husband or ex-husband ain't around.

4. Younger then you
If it can vote, you can poke.  18 is the absolute minimum age.  If they are 17 years, 364 days old DO NOT TOUCH until Midnight, lol. 

5. The "Farm System"
A system developed over 8 years ago by myself and Househead.  Basically it's just a ranking / scouting combine for women who are in between 15 and 17 years old.  15 year olds fall under the "Single A" class.  16 year olds go under the "Double A" or the "AA" class.  17 year olds are in the "Triple A", or "AAA" class.  But when they hit 18 - Welcome to the big leagues.

6. Older then you
This is a tricky one, and must be evaluated on a case-by-case basis.  50 is probably the highest of the highest cellings, for someone in between the ages of 18-28.  When you get into your 30's and up, you can add a few years to the top (But do yourself a favor and never subtract from the bottom

7. Location, location, location
IMO, discreetness is best.  Don't be a moron and "do it in a public place".  If you get busted, everyone finds out, and you can get arrested for it too.  Take her to your place, and if possible, during lunch mid-week, where it's nice and quiet and everyone's at work.  A nice Hotel room, like the Hard Rock Hotel, will earn you extra points.

8. Three or more?
Like winning the Super Bowl, or the World Series of Poker, having a 3-way is the Apex of this business.  It seems unnatainable for those of us who've never been there, and it's taken for granted by those of us who've done it.  But, it's NEVER over-rated. 

9. Cheat on your girlfriend?
I would never ever ever ever ever ever.  How-ever, some of you do, and would, and will, for whatever reason (gonna break up anyways, out of spite, to piss her off, like to be dangerous, etc...).  Just cover your trails like a professional serial killer and you'll be OK.  If you get sloppy, you will get caught, and that's going to be a lose-lose for you.

10.  Trades
Trades are the stickiest situation of them all.  Your girl isn't cutting it for you anymore, and you need to cut her, but don't want it to explode in your face.  Honesty is the best policy here.  It may hurt (for her), but hey at least she knows where she stands.  I gotta give credit where credit is due, so here it comes. Lee (yes, Lee), once totally ended a relationship with a hag girlfriend by just one day having enough of her shit, walking up to her and saying "You're cut.  We're done".  BOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!

[Denver_Bronco]

Great. Thread. Farm system ! LMAO ! And let me just say, Never bang a co-worker unless its the greatest thing you'll ever get in your life because regardless of the "no strings attached" that you believed was the deal, you will be unemployed once you stop banging them. Or B) they will bad mouth you to every other trick and you will have no shot with others.

[Househead]

5. The "Farm System"
A system developed over 8 years ago by myself and Househead.  Basically it's just a ranking / scouting combine for women who are in between 15 and 17 years old.  15 year olds fall under the "Single A" class.  16 year olds go under the "Double A" or the "AA" class.  17 year olds are in the "Triple A", or "AAA" class.  But when they hit 18 - Welcome to the big leagues.

I totally forgot about that. Funny sh*t.  We were good talent scouts.

[crazy_scar_man]

Awesome thread. Being married and having been with the same girl for something like 6 or 7 years, I'm totally out of the game. The only way I'm getting any strange is through the wonderful world of No. 8.

However, considering the wife is pregnant, my chances of that are about as much as Dave Gray breaking rule No. 4.

[Dave Gray]

I never believed in not dating people I work with...then again, my job sucked, and I would be willing to give it up for a girl that I liked.

I figure that so rarely do I make a connection with someone, that I could get another job if things went sour.

[Sunstroke]

What are your rules for banging chicks / girls you work with / girls you meet / etc??

Here are some of mine.

8. Three or more?
Like winning the Super Bowl, or the World Series of Poker, having a 3-way is the Apex of this business.  It seems unnatainable for those of us who've never been there, and it's taken for granted by those of us who've done it.  But, it's NEVER over-rated. 

Good stuff, I really like the Farm one as well.

As far as #8 goes...I think that threesomes, foursomes & moresomes are great, but you need to follow two semi-related sub-rules for this one:

1) Never, EVER have a threesome with two ex-girlfriends, especially if one (or both) of them still has feelings for you. My first 3 was in this mold when I was 19, and it made the evening about as not fun as an evening with two naked women could possibly be.

2) Never, EVER invite a new girlfriend/lover (within first 3 months of meeting) into something involving sex with other people, unless you're already planning the exit from that particular relationship. She won't ever look at you the same way once she's seen you pounding some other hottie from behind, no matter how "open" she says she is about such things.

[VidKid]

Also, in Georgia they can be 16....     

[Spider-Dan]

16 is the age of consent in quite a few states...

...just not mine. =/