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Author Topic: I need some laughs  (Read 3093 times)
dolphins4life
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THE ASSCLOWN AWARD
« on: March 15, 2010, 02:12:19 am »
I've hit a rough stretch recently and need some comic reliefs.

Post some funny jokes here, please. 
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MyGodWearsAHoodie
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« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2010, 09:26:15 am »
How many fleas does it take to screw in a lightbulb?





Only 2, the tricky part is getting the fleas into the lightbulb. 
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MaineDolFan
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« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2010, 09:59:05 am »
^^

LOL.
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"God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."
-Voltaire
Defense54
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« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2010, 10:04:37 am »
This is pretty funny:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jPuw_OPdSWc&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpBp17el9HQ&feature=related

 Grin
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dolphins4life
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THE ASSCLOWN AWARD
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2010, 01:55:56 pm »
Oh you thought those were funny:

Try these:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGwY_VKNmXg&feature=channel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mULNSfS12dM&feature=channel

What's even funnier, both of my first two singing videos have received 5 ratings twice.

Edited to add:  stay tuned for my latest piano cover.   It is going to be:
"My Life would suck without you" by Kelly Clarkson. 

« Last Edit: March 15, 2010, 02:12:25 pm by dolphins4life » Logged
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MyGodWearsAHoodie
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« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2010, 04:16:43 pm »
To keep this on topic....i thought i would only tell corny dolphin jokes in this post......

Why do dolphins only swim in salty water?








Pepper makes them sneeze!


What is a dolphin's favorite TV show ?








Whale of fortune !

Why are dolphins cleverer than humans ?






Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish !

To whom do dolphins go to borrow money ?










The loan shark !

What do you call a dolphin with no eyes?











a dolphn



Why did the dolphin cross the road ?












To get to the other tide !
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stinkfish
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« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2010, 06:57:58 pm »
What sits on the bottom of the ocean and trembles?


A nervous wreck Wink
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Dave Gray
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« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2010, 07:18:40 pm »
Did you know that scientists in Florida have started teaching dolphins to read?


In fact, Ted Ginn is up to a 3rd grade level.
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Defense54
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« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2010, 10:21:47 pm »
Quote from: Dave Gray on March 15, 2010, 07:18:40 pm
Did you know that scientists in Florida have started teaching dolphins to read?


In fact, Ted Ginn is up to a 3rd grade level.

I actually chuckled at that.  Smiley
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dolphins4life
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THE ASSCLOWN AWARD
« Reply #9 on: March 16, 2010, 01:17:32 am »
A blind man walks into  a bar with his seeing-eye dog. He stands in the center of the bar, takes the dog by the chain, and starts swinging him above his head.

Everyone stops and stares. Upset about the way the animal is being treated, a patron runs up to the blind man and demands, "What the hell are you doing?"

The blind man turns toward the patron and says, "Oh, nothing, just looking around."
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MyGodWearsAHoodie
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« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2010, 03:11:10 pm »
just got this in an email from mom......

During a recent password audit, it was found that a
Blonde was using the following password:

"MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDew eyDonaldGoofySacramento"

When asked why she had such a long password, she said
she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters
long and include at least one capital.
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dolphins4life
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THE ASSCLOWN AWARD
« Reply #11 on: March 23, 2010, 12:50:30 am »
Sorry, I had to bump this because I'm depressed again.  I forgot I had a test today and failed it.

A wise guy walks onto a crowded bus and asks the driver, "Hey Noah, is your ark full?"

The driver responds, "Nope, I'm one donkey short.  Come on in."
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dolphins4life
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THE ASSCLOWN AWARD
« Reply #12 on: March 23, 2010, 12:51:36 am »
oh and Defense, you'll LOVE this one.........


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpcJtvAkkJw

Notice anything different about me?

 Cheesy Cheesy
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